Feeling Sad

Well, this isn't really a big deal, I am just feeling sad tonight. I started thinking a day or so that Carter is showing signs of weaning and sure enough, a whole day of not wanting too.

This is so hard for me. I am grateful to be able to nurse my babies, and I know it is a blessing. I just have a hard time when they choose to be done, I guess it is part of my controlling personality!
I was able to nurse Brady until 13 months and I weaned him, Leilani weaned at 6 months and it broke my heart. I was hoping that Carter would continue, until his birthday, just under 3 months away. This isn't very far away, right???

In my world, it seems like forever. I just feel hurt by it, even though I know it is unintentional.

He got sick a little while ago and couldn't breathe to nurse, so I am guessing that this is what triggered it, so how do I get him back? I tried pumping to keep the flow going but he won't even latch on for longer then 5 seconds to even get the let-down. When he even gets in the nursing postition, he thrashes about and will not have anything to do with it. He sounds like I am torturing him! Any suggestions from my nursing friends out there?
I feel that it is done. I don't think that I can get him back, but hey I made it 9 months! That is good, right??

Sorry, I really try not to vent too much, because most of you probably don't care anyway, I just feel like writing and sharing how I feel. I feel that he is still too young and I will miss this bond greatly! It is one of my favorite things with babies, it is a conneciton that is wonderful and I just hate to think that he is done. Oh well, such is life and I will get through it. Life actually gets easier when you don't have to nurse all the time, but I am not quite ready for it! Off to cry a little more!

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Pictures, because

Wow, two posts in a week??? I have been a little out of it lately. Just to update on our lives. Bryce started a new job back home, so we are all here and happy! It was kind of crazy, we had job offers from a couple of places, so we felt very blessed to have options. We choose where we wanted to be, but made sure it was where we should be. We love our little valley and are so excited to be back.

I haven't taken very many pictures of our activities, because it seems we haven't done very much. We have, but there is no proof! I have some random pictures, and mostly of Carter, since he is the one that grows so fast!

He is my sitter now. He hates to be laying downand just wants to be apart of everything! Our latest adventure has been homeade baby food, thank you Courtney! I love it, I can make all sorts of different flavors and he loves it! He doesn't like the other stuff very much, but that's okay.

He doesn't have any teeth yet, which is crazy, since my others got theirs around 6, and is almost 8, yup 8! They grow so fast!

Okay, here are some pictures, with no captions necessary.

Coconut Mango

My mom has decided to take up Thai cooking, which she is really good at. She is always trying to get me to staty longer when I visit and when she says Thai, I am there! One of the recipes that she makes is similar to our favorite dessert from a resturant up there. It is so good and so easy, and for my health food friends and family I am sure that if you used brown rice instead, it would be awesome!

So here goes:
2 cups cooked sticky rice

While rice is cooking:
Take 2 cups of coconut milk
1 cup sugar
1/2 tsp. salt

Bring to a boil and then let cool.

Once your rice is done, transfer it to a metal bowl (why?? I don't really know, this is what my mom does).

Add your coconut mixture to the rice, cover and let cool about an hour. I put my in the fridge.

When your hour is almost up make your topping:
1/2 c. coconut milk
dash of salt (this is optional, I think it is too salty if you add salt to both)
1 T. sugar
Optional: 1 tsp. tapioca starch (to make it thicker)

Warm this on the stove, until almost boiling, not too hot.
Cut up about 3 ripe mangoes

Serve with rice on the bottom, sliced mangoes and then the sauce on top.

Yummay! Enjoy!

Numba 10!

Today is mine and Bryce's 10 year anniversary! I can't believe that it has been 10 years, and at the same time, I can't believe it hasn't been longer then that, if that makes any sort of sense????

Going to Preference 1998, couldn't find a wedding pic.

Most recent family pic.

Today was a great day to celebrate our anniversary. Some may say, why Sunday? You can't go out and do things, but we went to something that doesn't happen very often. We were able to attend the Oquirrh Mountain Temple Dedication today. It is always so neat to be apart of something like that and to hear the words of the prophet and apostles, what is better then that?

It was a great day and I felt blessed to have my husband by my side! Thank you to my wonderful mother-in-law for watching my kids.

I am very humble to know that the choice that we made 10 years ago, to be sealed in the temple, is what is what helps us through these trying times. I know the spirit continually blesses our lives and things will work out as they should, wherever we are called.

Thank you Bryce for being a wonderful husband and father. I can't wait for many more years and eternity to come! Love ya Babe!

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!
Today is Bryce's birthday and I am so happy to be able to celebrate with him. It has been a long past month but we are together, for at least another few weeks.
To my hubby:
He is an amazing father and husband.
He is constantly trying to make our family better and is a great example of service.
There is never a time when he doesn't drop whatever he is doing and help someone who needs him.
His family comes first above anything else.
When he is given a calling, he does it and doesn't complain about it.
Whenever I just need a to laugh, he is there.
He just brings a smile to my face.

There is so much more but we have an anniversary coming up, so I shall save it for later!

Happy Birthday babe! May you have a wonderful day!